Which comes first? The frustrated chicken or the egg that is bored. Is frustration possibly pregnant with boredom or vice versa? Many struggle with these two issues. So where do they originate? Though it could be many possibilities, the majority seem to struggle due to a demanding spirit that goes after what is desired. The trouble with demands is that they seek to fullful desires. But desires come without instruction. One just hammers away aimlessly in any attempt to have the desire fulfilled without regard to what is best. 1 Corinthians 9:26
Surrender of the will that is called for by the Scriptures is thought of as something weak and/or foolish at this point. Though we are called to submit to the Holy Spirit and be instructed by Him through the Word and also spirit-led mentors, we tend to rely on our own wisdom.
If I demand what I desire, I only set myself up to refuse it once I receive it. I won’t enjoy it nor can I. The demanding spirit never stops demanding. It’s not in its nature to enjoy.
Unknowingly, my demands create many of the questions that I have. I therefore look for the answers that fit without ever questioning the purpose and motive of the question. I constantly search for a new answer to replace what I have to meet my continuing demands.
A demanding spirit evolves into one of two conditions; bitterness or indifference. This takes form in its earlier stages by refusing and abusing tenderness and affection from others and yourself.
With bitterness we tend to abuse affection by harsh repetitive criticism while tearing down verbally whatever attempts someone makes to give what is demanded.
With indifference we tend to abuse by withholding words in the form of silent treatment, a crafty yet powerful form of anger.
The result is frustration and boredom that steals the discernment and experience of beauty in ourselves and others. We become an enemy to beauty seeing it as something to conquer, kill or hide.