We have been steeped in a companionship that fulfills our deepest desires, but sometimes our wants confuse this cherished fellowship. As our obedience increases, however, those misguided wants emerge into intimacy. Consider a woman who is consumed with the idea of marriage. Her partner is her object of desire, but to be married is her actual desire. However, once the bond between the two becomes stronger, he becomes the desire.
We are created for deep, soulful relationships. We can be wooed by ideas or ideals, but we can only become more alive when we take the responsibility of intimacy seriously.
We hunt for the objects of our desires, but the weapons we use to get them are often what we fall in love with. This is true in the way we use the attributes we possess to form relationships. A man who uses his humor to make people laugh can often use the laughs as a form of comfort (in place of the friendships). A woman can use her beauty to attract a partner, but she can also use her beauty to distract herself from experiencing intimacy.
The hunt for the objects of our desires is an obstruction to what we really long for, and ultimately, what we really need. We must kill our expectations that lead us to a standstill. Instead, let us dance to the song of intimacy, though the beat is often unknown.