One of the chief causes of blindness to beauty.
Converting the interior blueprints of a person into a finished product.
Tuning in, toning down, and lightening up.
The power of his word suffices.
We are to mentor, not intimidate. Lead rather than demand blind obedience from public and private shaming. Death by lecture is a parent trap that mames the parent or authority. Authoritative tenderness is the answer. Inform to reform. Stand and be the argument rather than argue endlessly into infinity with duplicity of empty words.
Strong-arm tactics by shaming show the lack of persuasive power. Persuasion leads a person to hear a voice other than the voice of the persuader. Spirit awakening by rediscovering the voice-spirit in another is what I call voice recognition that actives heart touch.
A heart touched rather than lectured is a treasure indeed.
How often we complain and argue about things that are near unchangeable. These are things embedded in our culture, the culture of our church, or institutions where we work. Even family traditions could be added to the list. Try to change them and you'll face the same challenge you face when trying to change something about yourself. It's hard to change something alone. We have all heard someone say "You've made you bed, now lie in it". Unfortunately, the bed often feels too short to be able to rest. Isaiah 28:20
My anxiety over the necessary change to survive, the guilt from not reaching my potential, and the anxiety of learning new ways to think and behave are the underlying issues.
It's impossible to handle and to heal from these issues without the help of others because the process of unlearning my old ways creates even more anxiety.
Unlearning isn't done by imitation of others. When they are out of the picture I'll just revert to my former ways and be on my own again. Judges 2:18,19
Inviting others in to help redefine my way of thinking according to my own personality and relationships through trial and error leads me to transformational change. 2 Corinthians 3:16-18
I learn to reach out in order to hold out through awareness rather than fairness. Philippians 2:14-18
When we get mad or frustrated and these emotions don't lead us to grieving what happened, the transforming power that is given to us is forfeited. To grieve is to be a loved one or the least of these and the capacity to receive is reopened.
The thrill of freedom. Freedom allows commitment and commitment is an exercise of the will.
Often first found in what is being overlooked.
This is a line I often hear in conflict, yet it barely scratches the surface of the feeling "behind the lines" so to speak. More times than not it reveals a need for a concrete answer to a concrete question that gives the space for two people to live in intimacy as one couple sharing their various differences and preferences in order to be seen and known.
It takes a free man or woman to usher another into freedom. Psalm 118:5 Taking others seriously by serving them before taking their spoken words literally is how we strengthen and sing them into this freedom. Psalm 142:7
Over time serving them allows the freedom to move away from their refuge of words into the refuge of friendship through fellowship. 2 Corinthians 7:13-16
We hold them through listening rather than holding them to an accountability of only what is said. This intimacy brings meaning as a person rather than a problem. Amos 8:4
They begin to taste and see who they really are rather than a meaningless shadow using words to hide behind.
Learn to freely listen through compassion and comfort first received, then given. 2 Corinthians 1:3-7
True accountability is born out of freedom, not imposition. Our deepest struggle is rarely what we think is wrong. Our deepest struggle is confronting the freedom that we have and being accountable to it by choice. In that confrontation by reflecting on what we are thinking(carefully thought), we begin to overcome evil with good. In other words we begin to meet resistance with gentleness born out of the knowledge that overcoming evil by trying to be right is really demanding justice without giving it. That is no accountability. It’s simply bondage.
Giving justice frees us from the need to avoid wrong and just freely turn from it.
For example if I say I struggle with jealousy, my struggle is not with jealousy but the freedom not to be while holding myself accountable to that free choice.
Redemption after wailing. Wailing has the sense and the sound of hell. But it can be the journey to the well of grief. The wall blocking grief is revenge or the need to avenge. Don’t get even, get sad. Then the real journey that requires no travel begins.
Echoes without the mirrored image.