Pain Purifies

In sports we believe "No pain, no gain". There is a purpose to the pain. It removes what hinders and strengthens what is essential. The removal of what hinders is often the most painful. I call this the unlearning pain. It's the humiliation of letting go of what we have learned that is habitual or valued that now is in the way of progress. 

I remember when I began to study the martial art of Hapkido, my instructor asked about my former training. When I told him I had none, he smiled and said "Great!" because I had far less to unlearn to gain the purity of his teaching. The pain of learning was just as intense as unlearning because of what I had to go through to discipline impulses, thoughts, and fear. I also had to gain mental, emotional, and physical flexibility to reach the heights I needed to excel. 

In everyday life it is much the same. We have wounds and injuries of all types, yet we have rarely been taught the wisdom required to see purpose, meaning, and value of life with pain. 

Pain separates us from what we hold tightly in order to purify. So what falls back together should be more genuine if guided by wisdom. 

 

Verbal Highlighting

Our repetitive words become a magic marker highlighting something very important. We highlight things we read that should be remembered. What we say that should be remembered(aware of) is often repeated within a conversation. For example: when you catch yourself repeating the word "maybe", you are highlighting something often subconsciously convicting. Or, when you repeat the 3 words "in my mind", what is being highlighted is that you are stuck on something you say or have accepted but don't really believe because it is untrue or only partially true. An example of this might be "I  am depressed" when I am really  just tired. Or, "I am miserable" when I am just angry. Or, "it's not important" when I value it with my life.

There are many different verbal highlights that we learn to take note of as they are spoken. But without someone to give voice to what you said through listening, questioning, or rephrasing, it's difficult to read or recognize your own verbal notes. Learning how to string them together into your natural rhythms make you a highlight or headlight for others. 

Sharp

The way to a winning seam. TThe seamless unity of a fluent use of words to accomplish the goal of faith. 2 Timothy 2:14-15

Devoted

Burned up but not burned out. Committed wholeheartedly. Self removed. Accountability bringing out hidden potential driven by the Spirit. In-sourced to be outsourced. 

Harsh Mellows

The rise to power in business or organizations through money, position, skills, contacts, or knowledge brings out the tendency to become harsh with others, not always intentional but harsh nevertheless. Over time it becomes easier to rely on one's own wisdom since any behavior can be justified due to success.  Leading others harshly risks intensifying their doubt rather than encouraging them in belief. What is thought of as needed encouragement comes out more as criticism, often harsh criticism.  Justification by success leads toward a growing self-deceit, arrogance, and harshness in dealing with others when mercy is required. Proverbs 18:23

Being sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit through faith enables one to lead in the bigger picture without seeing only a bigger picture of oneself. John 3:30-31  Seeking to lead by serving, knowing, and forgiving others enables leadership that is firm without being a marshmallow, yet with gentleness and respect. Genesis 50:19-21

Pride

Numb to need.

Leadership: Real or Strong?

Asking the question "How do I become a real leader rather than a strong one?" positions you to be strengthened continuously rather than draining your strength trying to be really strong. Ask and see. 

Self-Helpers

I'm often asked if I know of any good self-help books to recommend for someone to read. I find that ironic in that asking me for help to find a self-help book kills the original intent. I might consider writing a book on how to find a self-help book without asking for help to find it. That would maintain one's self-help integrity. However if you are still thinking what kind of book to read and you insist on a self-help book, read a self-care book about asking for help.

Conviction

Hearty cooperation.